Wedding Cake
by writergirl318
Summary: Never let a Marauder go to weddings. Especially their own. Lily and James's Wedding Reception. Just how many things can go wrong? ONE-SHOT


**Another one-shot that I thought up while I was watching videos of couples cramming wedding cake onto their faces and I thought of what would happen when James did it to Lily…. This should be fun. XD. Please review and tell me what you think!**

**If I owned Harry Potter, I'd be filthy freakin' rich and James and Lily would have never had to die. It makes me too sad. :(**

_Wedding Cake_

Lily Evans Potter sighed as she plopped into the seat reserved just for her. Next to her, her new husband fell into his chair, just as exhausted. "Almost done," James Potter was repeating to her the whole day.

His black hair had obviously been tried to be tamed for his wedding day, but it still stuck out in every direction, even worse than normally, if that was even possible. His hazel eyes were framed with glasses and were staring at Lily like she was the greatest prize he could have ever won.

As his fingers began to run through his hair as was his habit, Lily smacked his hand away and said, "Don't do that; your hair looks awful enough already."

"So does yours," he retorted lightly, only joking as he fingered one of her plastic-feeling curls.

Lily had bright red hair and sparkling emerald eyes that were always one of the first thing a person would register about her. She was wearing a gorgeous white dress that made her feel like she was floating and had hand-embroidered flowers all around it and pearls along the low neckline. Her veil had been pushed back and revealed her face that glowed happily. Her long hair had been curled and piled up on top of her head. As the hairdresser had done her job, Lily meticulously counted out exactly fifty-seven hairpins. Her hair didn't move at all because of the entire bottle of hairspray they had used, every time one of the curls seemed like it might be about to fall.

"I didn't think getting married would be so much work," she moaned as she rubbed her sore neck.

James chuckled and began to rub her shoulders. "I was more worried that you'd be convinced that I was still that bratty little kid and you'd run away."

She returned the smile as she thought back to the days when they'd been at Hogwarts and had hated each other. Well, he had explained to her time and time again that he had _never ever_ hated her. She had thought she had hated him because he would ask her out, completely arrogant and sure of himself that he'd get her but then he would hex her best friend not fifteen minutes prior to the situation.

Lily grimaced, not wishing to go down the path of her old friend. The past was the past, and she would never have Severus Snape as her friend again. She blinked, trying to catch herself before James noticed. "Sometimes you still act like it."

James frowned, and she mentally cursed. Of course he would know her well enough to immediately tell when something was wrong. She had married him, for Merlin's sake! "What is it, Lily? Is something wrong with the decorations? Are they playing the wrong song?"

She smiled gratefully. Count on James to be the one who had to make sure that everything was perfect for his lovely bride. "I'm fine, sweetie." Her grin turned malicious. "It's just that I realized that I'm a Potter! I vowed that I'd never say yes to anything for James Potter!" She made like she was going to leave. "Oh, I'm so sorry, but I can't break my vow!"

He grabbed her and pulled her closer to him until she could smell his lovely scent that reminded her of a Quidditch pitch after Gryffindor had won for some obscure reason. "But then you'll break the one you told me!"

"Oh, that's right," she amended with a laugh. "I guess I'm stuck with you then!"

James kissed her on the mouth before he released Lily and sighed. "Finally, I can kiss you like that and know that you'll always kiss me back."

"Mum made us come over here." Standing before the new couple was Lily's older sister, Petunia, and her husband, Vernon Dursley. Petunia was bone thin and glared at Lily with venom only she could possess. "Congratulations. Now you can have a whole circus of freaks!"

Lily gritted her teeth before she said, "At least they won't be half whale!"

James chortled beside her as Vernon turned a shade of puce and Petunia looked ready to burst one of the veins sticking off of her bony hands. "I see you found someone who enjoys your awful jokes," Petunia snarled with a glare towards James. "At least I don't have to listen to them. Bye, Freak." She grabbed the purple Vernon and walked away with amazing temper control.

"I liked the half-whale one," James chuckled. "It made my day that much better."

"But I made your day, didn't I?" Lily asked with a smile.

Somehow, they ended up snogging again, but someone suddenly tackled James from the side. It knocked all three of them to the ground, and Lily heard a barking, dog-like laugh that meant Sirius Black, best friend of James, was too close for comfort if he could be heard.

"Wow, I didn't think I was that great at interrupting a snog!" Sirius's gray eyes shined radiantly with laughter. The Marauder was dressed in a tux and of course just had to be James's best man. No matter how much begging she had done, where Sirius was concerned, James put his foot down.

Not that she hated him of course; actually, he was usually rather funny. But somehow, knowing that the best man was trying to see how far back he could hit a person with a spit ball while she was getting married sort of crushed the romance. And times like now made her really mad.

James had to hoist her up all by himself seeing as she couldn't get up from the floor without tearing the glossy folds of her dress. As soon as she was upright she yelled, "Black, why do you have to be such a prat and tackle my husband?"

Sirius chortled. "You'd better watch it, Padfoot," James warned, using their nicknames for each other. "She's going to hurt you. I'm serious."

Sirius wagged his head. "No, I'm Sirius! Get your names right, Prongs! Or you'll be sleeping on the couch once you moan Miranda Selimore's name after a good snog with your wife."

Lily's anger had quickly flared, but then her mother came right before she raised her fist to give the best man a bloody nose. "Lily, James," she crooned, "It's time to cut the cake."

By the way she saw the two Marauders grinning at each other like mischievous idiots, she knew it was going to be a disaster.

The cake had four layers, seeing as there were just so many people because of their wizard and muggle friends, and was decorated with dark blue flowers and pretty emerald greens. Of course it was both chocolate and vanilla flavored; Lily couldn't bear to think about a cake that wasn't chocolate.

James and Lily clumsily cut themselves a rather large piece of cake (James's hand had 'slipped') and they both prepared the forkfuls for each other. Just before they ate, Lily warned him, "If you _dare_ smear that cake all over my face, you will no longer be able to have a honeymoon. Or children."

He chuckled but they both maturely fed each other the cake.

And then James picked up the plate and smashed the cake all over Lily's face.

Sirius's roars of laughter could be heard over the rest of the crowd, and Lily slowly wiped some of the gunk from her eyes so she could see clearly. She slowly took the glasses off of James's face, just then realizing that he was concerned that she was mad at him as the crowd waited with a bated breath.

Then she picked up the top layer of the cake, the one usually saved for the couple to eat on their first anniversary and shoved it on his face. She pressed her fingers against the cake and squished it all over his face and even let a few chunks go down his shirt.

As everyone laughed at the scene that could have been from the Three Stooges, Lily wiped her hands daintily on a napkin and went to the bathroom to wash off her face.

When she returned, half an hour later after reapplying her basic makeup, she found that James had washed his face off, too, but he was talking with Sirius and the other two Marauders, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew. The other boys were laughing, but James looked worried.

As soon as he was aware that she was approaching the table, James leaped up and was by her side in an instant. "Did I upset you? Oh, love, I'm so sorry! I shouldn't have done that!"

Lily held up her hand to stop him. "It's fine; I got my revenge didn't I? But you still have a little cake on your face."

"Where?" James was just so absolutely easily to manipulate, and he was one of the best manipulators in the world! He rubbed at his face frantically, trying to determine if anyone had noticed it.

She put her arms around his neck, "Let me get that for you." She leaned in and kissed the corner of her mouth before her lips moved to his.

"Please, don't snog my little girl while I'm watching!" They broke apart to see Lily's father with a hand slapped over his eyes.

"Aww, Daddy," Lily crooned. She left the circle of James's arms to embrace Mr. Evans. "I'm married now; you can't get a restraining order now."

"That's what bothers me," he muttered, only half-joking. "Anyways, your mum is in a dither about the cake and says that it's time to throw the bouquet and stuff."

Lily sighed. "At least we can go on our honeymoon after all of this."

James smoothly wrapped his arms around her waist after her father had moved away. "Well, let's get it over with."

She sighed when her Maid of Honor, Emmaline Vance, handed her the bouquet and ran off to stand with the other girls. When Lily turned her back to all the girls pushing to get to the front, James was there, smiling lightly at her.

She threw the flowers over her head behind her and heard all the squeals of the girls as they elbowed each other in the gut. When she turned around, she found that it had landed in the hands of Alice Rawlins. Alice was grinning like an idiot and her boyfriend, Frank Longbottom winked at her.

Someone pushed a chair forward and James motioned for her to sit. Lily blushed profusely as she heard the Marauders' laughter at her probably beet red face. James knelt down in front of her, and she shyly stuck out her right leg where she could feel the lacy garter scratching her skin.

James was grinning at her discomfort. "I'm not going to bite, love. Very hard."

He laughed and lifted up her skirts slightly before sticking his head under the white material. She almost wished she could see his face, just to be sure that he wouldn't do anything sneaky. Lily could feel his nose skimming against her skin. She shivered when he reached her knee and continued upward. She could already tell that he was enjoying this _way_ too much.

Suddenly, his cool tongue slid across her skin, making Lily jump and almost topple off of the chair. "James!" she scolded in a slightly breathless voice. The guests laughed and her face reddened a few shades deeper. Finally he had found her garter and slipped it down with his hands, but he took his time getting out from under her dress, kissing his way back down her leg.

When he got out, she half-heartedly punched him on the shoulder. "You are _so_ dead."

James only chuckled. "You didn't like it?"

A glare was his only answer.

He through the garter backwards, keeping his eyes on her the entire time. Lily laughed when the garter went in the wrong direction, away from the crowd of males, eager to get the garter, and landed on the table right in front of Remus Lupin, who had declared the practice, 'just a silly old myth.'

"So who are ya gonna marry, Moony?" Peter asked excitedly as the other Marauders and Lily settled down next to him.

"No one," Remus brooded as everyone laughed.

All too soon, it was time for the sendoff. Lily parted with James so that they could exchange their wedding clothes for something much more comfortable. Lily emerged from the bathroom in a lovely emerald green dress that James insisted made her look even more beautiful if that were even possible. James came in nice black trousers and a blue shirt.

They kissed on the doorstep before James led her through the rain of rice, as everyone, including them, laughed. When they reached the car, though, Lily was much less than amused.

It was almost indistinguishable beneath the coating of shaving cream. Someone had duck-taped the doors, not just the handles, but almost the entire doors. James helped her open the passenger side before he left to work on his side. Knowing that if this was the work of who she thought it was, Lily opened the door so that she was behind it. An awful smell inhabited the car and balloons spilled out of the car, overflowing it. She realized as they kept flowing from the car, that they had been charmed to fit in the car.

James pulled put a pocket knife that Mr. Evans had given to him and began popping all the balloons, but it seemed that there was ten times more for each balloon. Lily managed to hid her hand somewhat in the midst of the balloons as she appeared to stop them, and with a flick of her wand, she had stopped the flowing balloons until they could finally get to the car.

When they had cleared the front seats and prepared to leave, Lily marched over to Sirius, Remus and Peter who were all red from laughter and wished she could hex them good. "You prats! You are so dead when I get back from my honeymoon!"

"Aw, Lily," Peter teased, "We wouldn't want you to end up in Azkaban."

"You are going to be on quite the killing spree when you return won't you, Lils?" Sirius asked cheekily. "Just try to leave James in one piece; I want to play a prank on him when I get back."

Her hand twitched but she turned around and got in the car without another word. When she settled down in the passenger seat with a _hmph_, James took her hand in his and rubbed circles into her skin. "Aw, sweetie, what did you expect from them?"

"Maturity," she grumbled.

James kissed her on the mouth, which had her cheered up almost instantly, before he pulled out and they headed off to a car wash.

"Merlin," she sighed tiredly, "I'm never getting married again."

"Well, I would hope not," James teased lightly with a smile that lit up her whole world.

**Did you like it? Remember to review! I had a lot of fun writing this one-shot and I hope you liked reading it!**


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